More Updates...

Jon and Morgan are officially married! Sooo happy for them! They were just goofy happy all day! I have never seen Jon so perfectly happy so it made it that much better! The St. George temple is stunning and beautiful as well so it just added to the beautiful and spiritual feeling of the day. My job was to watch Lizzie and Tyler while Karen and Nate were in the temple. I have to admit I was a lil nervous cuz I know my kids can get their kids all riled up but all of my and other's prayers were answered and all of them behaved VERY well! Such a huge blessing on such a special day! I really wish I would have been able to go to the ceremony but I am thankful that I was able to watch the kids cuz no one else was available to be able to help watch them so it worked better that way! The reception was fun and a bit more laid back feel to it but it was beautifully decorated with white table clothes and chair covers with blue bows on the back. The cake was pretty odd with the bride and groom figures but it's what they wanted so it works! They also had dancing which was way fun!! I will definitely copy that when I get married again! It will be one big party for sure!!

Updates...

So Halloween was a blast and the kids had a great time! We went trick or treating with Kare, Nate, Lizzie, and Tyler around their neighborhood and Deanna, Allison, and Jen came too and ALL of us dressed up so it was even more fun!! As you can see in the pic, Hannah was a witch and Isaac was a skeleton :) The kids got a lot of candy and had a great time! I also got to meet my friend's brother and his wife and most of their kids. This is the friend from my CNA class that is dating my nephew and they are most likely going to get married in January! Matchmaker Carolyn!!

Awesomeness!

Had a great time tonight with Karen and Nate and their kiddos and Michelle and her kiddos! We went up in Provo Canyon to Timanogos park (I think) and had a picnic and let the kids run around and then went back to the Pusey's and the kids decorated pumpkin shaped sugar cookies. Karen gave a great lesson on eternal families and we all had a wonderful time! I really am grateful for my wonderful family! They are awesome! Frustrating sometimes but I know we all have each other's back always!! I really think that if everyone had good solid families like ours, there would be far less problems in the world. But, you have to factor in the whole Satan thing and free agency and that's when ya get messes but it would still be great!
So trying not to care so much about the whole wedding thing and so far it's workin pretty well! I have completely given up on ever being a bride's maid because I realized that I totally missed out on those life experiences that allow girls to form those close bonds that make them bride's maids. I didn't go to a regular college, I don't live in the same town I grew up in and I hate dumb girls that think the world revolves around stupid boys! So, that pretty much kicks me out of every bride's maid category ever!! So, I refuse to do anything wedding related for anyone unless they specifically ask me (which they won't)! I, in turn, if I ever get married, will do everything myself because too many people get their feelings hurt over stupid wedding stuff and it's just not worth it. If we do have a wedding party and he wants to have groom's men then I will just pick whomever I happen to be associating with at the time and Deanna will be my matron of honor cuz she is the only that actually gets me all the time and has always treated me like a sister instead of a kid. And there ya have it! Still sucks being rejected for that job though and not even having any prospect of dating right now so it's more a problem of jealousy right now than anything else.

Time Is Flying

It is amazing to me that I have already worked at the care center for a month! Feels like just a couple of weeks! I really am very comfortable with my job now and the people I work with are great! Some are a lil on the lazy side of course but I catch myself becoming that way also! One of the awesome girls at work just got a job with IHC. I am totally jealous but she has worked at the care center for over a year so she has definitely put in her dues! I just hope that after I have a year's experience I can get on with the medical powerhouse myself. I can do so much more and go farther in my career once I am working for them and they will also help pay for school so I can get my RN. Every job I apply for with them though I feel like I'm not going to get so I am going to try doing some positive thinking so that I'm putting out good energy!!

Strange Things...

I think the whole lack of sleep is really starting to mess with my head a lot! I really don't know what day it is anymore and time is passing sooo quickly that it's just flat out weird!
I have been working at the care center for almost a month now! Crazy I know! It has had its ups and downs as with any job of course. There are some great people that work there though and that makes it fun and I'm sure as I get to know people better it will be even better to pass my time there :). I really don't want to work there forever and couldn't afford to work there forever but it will work until I can land a great job with an IHC facility! That's the goal for now anyway since they will do tuition reimbursement so I can get my RN cheaper than trying to pay for it myself. I am getting really anxious to get started on it though so I might start checking into the Weber State on-line program cuz that is something I could totally handle rather than trying to find time to go to a class and taking that much more time away from my kids. So, I think I'm gonna look into that and possibly get the ball rolling. I kept feeling like now wasn't the time to start that but I think I was just afraid that I would be unsuccessful because of my past failures at UVU but had a huge success at Ameritech and MATC when I was taking classes in the medical field! So, since I know what I want to do and my success at the general ed classes will determine if I get in the RN program I think I will do MUCH better! So here we go!!!

Slacker

Each time I work, I see these people that are obese and can't walk very well and have tons of health problems and it really motivates me to do something other than sit on my behind all day. But then I get home and for some reason am completely exhausted and totally unmotivated! Then I try and get ready for work and I have a ton of cute scrubs that I can't even wear anymore cuz they are too tight but I don't want to give in and buy more in the larger sizes cuz I really want to lose the weight but I just feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place :(
I can make a positive step in the right direction with how I eat though. I am going to start taking carrots to work cuz they are crunchy and will keep me awake and they have like 15 calories for 30 of the baby carrots or something like that. And, although I went a little extreme last time, that's how I lost a ton of weight when I first got divorced so I know it will help. I also need to have a lean protein so that my blood sugar doesn't get low and it will be a better way to lose the weight then just eating carrots for lunch every day!
I still haven't had any pop since the beginning of May so that is great for me! I really really crave it sometimes but have no idea how my stomach will react after the gastritis so I don't mess with it at all!

Pity Party

It is amazing to me how negative thoughts just feed off each other until you are in a full blown pity party! I really don't know what started the Negative Nelly Train but I am having a hard time derailing it! It could have been feeling incompetent while trying to fill my tire with more air and not being very successful, or it could have been my apartment getting completely trashed every hour or two with the kids home, or the lack of money that I have and lack of hours at work to compensate for that deficit, or the fact that I'm still single without any hope of getting married ever again while my nephew is getting married in 2 months and my sister is pregnant (2 things I want badly), or it could be that I need a new windshield on my car and an oil change that I don't have money for, or it could be that I am obese and can't seem to do a dang thing about it cuz something always comes up to cause more stress so I don't eat well or exercise cuz I'm depressed and that makes me tired ALL the time! Wow! What a whiner I am! So, now I am going to counteract the negativity and try and get some sense of control in a world where I have NO control over anything but my response! It is a great thing that I was able to get a job because I only have 7 months experience! I may not have the hours I need yet but I can talk to people tomorrow at work and see how that can be remedied. I can find comfort in things besides food like family and friends and escaping in a movie for a lil bit. I am a good person no matter what my size is, the only reason I need to lose this weight is so I can be healthy and not get diabeties or a heart condition or cancer (since all 3 run in my family). I can get help from my family in order to get all the stuff done for my car cuz they love me and love to help and I would do anything for them! As far as the guy thing goes, I am putting that completely in Heavenly Father's hands cuz there isn't anything I can do about that except be worthy to receive the blessing cuz I can't go to the singles ward or activities cuz of the kids so there ya have it! So, in other words, I can be in control by taking steps to solve the problems that arise in my life EVERY DANG DAY! The situation doesn't control me or how I deal with it and there isn't just one way to deal with it, there are always alternatives like my Mom taught me :)